Hieronymus Jones and the teacup squid is now completely free.
What the hell is this book all about? click to read more.
book marketing… EWWWWW.
Ahhh, the fine art of book marketing, could there be anything better? yes, yes there could, I can think of about fifteen gajillion things that are more fun than book marketing. Yes… gajillion is a real mathematical term, it is a one with one quintillion zeros after it, bet you didn’t know that, did you? That was a lie. Gajillion is a totally made up thing… but I digress.
Book marketing, not a fan. I love writing, crafting an entire world from a blank page is like crack to me, but telling people about it is a painful soul destroying experience mired in the very depths of a hell I seem unable to escape from, still, important to remain upbeat about these things. So I thought I would tell you all a little about my book so you can decide if it is something you might like to grab a copy of (especially while it’s free.)
The jacket.
Hieronymus Jones was a strange boy, a hair past fifteen, tall and pale with jet black hair, dark brown eyes and a very peculiar kind of mind. If he was not the smartest thing on the planet, he was a very close second. He had secrets, dark and terrible, wonderful and pure. Secrets of hidden worlds with lost people, that were not entirely human. Most unusually, he held secrets… of magic. When Hieronymus Jones saw Gertrude Green for the first time, he sat up a little straighter in his seat. She was an odd girl with a smattering of freckles across her pale skin, impossibly red hair and perfect green eyes. She too had secrets. Together they would discover a connection to each other, far deeper than either could have imagined. Mysterious pendants, evil twisted mounds of monstrous flesh and school bullies are one thing, but when a small unimpressed squid makes a nest in Hieronymus’s cup of tea, something clearly needs to be done. Honestly, this is TEA we are talking about, don’t these creatures have any manners? The first book in a fantasy romance series, awash with bleeding edge technology, magic, humor and hideous tentacle laden, Lovecraftian nightmares, that are coming to kill the world… woot.
Lovecraft, high school and romance.
The previous paragraph was from the back cover and while it gives you an idea lets delve a little deeper shall we? yes, yes we shall. now don’t judge me but I am a sucker for a good high school romance. from anime to novels, whatever, so long as there is awkwardness and romance, then baby I am all over that bad boy. So it stands to reason that my book series would also be a high school romance and it is… sort of. don’t get me wrong there is romance to be sure and it is set in a high school but there are a few other elements included too. Like a bevy of sea dwelling, monstrously twisted, evil Lovecraftian creatures with a plan to destroy the world… Hooray. Now I love H.P. Lovecraft, reading his tale ‘a shadow over Insmouth’ was a defining moment in my early life and the exact reason I will not set foot in natural bodies of water. What is living down there? you don’t know, is it fish? is it sharks? is it gross squidgy sea demons with tentacles? why don’t you take a dip… while I sit safely on the shore… laughing. My innate fear of things from the deep is certainly reflected in this book, the bad guys all climbed out of my worst friggen nightmares… tentacle having jerks.
Hiero and Gerty.
At its core this book is all about the two main characters Hieronymus Jones and Gertrude Green. It follows their trials and tribulations as they deal with everything from bullies to magic and high technology, to lost, hidden and forgotten creatures, not all of whom are gone for good. There is a good deal of humor as well as more than a few less than pleasant situations the two fifteen year olds are forced to deal with. Not everything is hunky dory on the island where they make their home. there are secrets that both hide and a deep connection to each other that neither can quite explain. Each character is deeply likable but massively flawed in one way or another, both isolated and alone in many ways, each finding strength in the other. Hieronymus Jones and the teacup squid is a fast paced enjoyable read that will have you laughing like a lunatic, crying like a manically depressed baby and will keep you entertained to the last page. This book is the first in an ongoing series and book two, Hieronymus Jones, the Lemurian concern, is coming soon.
Get the friggen book.
Please let me know if you have any questions at all and I will be happy to answer them for you. Also please pick up a copy of Hieronymus Jones and the teacup squid on Amazon now, while it’s still free. If you could possibly leave a review too, that would be highly appreciated.